go to bed!

My kids have actually gotten into a routine of going to bed pretty dang well. There were years of fighting with Jordan. I tried everything - the supernanny thing where you sit there forever, spanking her, threatening her, time-outs, etc. It was hopeless.

For a while now, they've been going to bed really well. Jordan will sometimes make up some sort of excuse to come out once: a hug, another trip to the potty, to tell me just one more thing. Usually I give her a hug and firmly tell her to go back to bed and that's the end of it.

Every once in a while they're a little goofy and I can tell they're going to fool around in their room the minute I'm out of it. Tonight was one of those nights. I tucked them all in and told them to go to bed. They were bouncy and giggly and I kind of figured it wouldn't be quite as smooth as that.

Two minutes later they both came bursting out of their room and said they needed to pee. I told them to go. They tried really hard and both managed to produce something. They had gone about eight minutes earlier. I then went back into their rooms and they had all their stuff piled onto Jordan's bed and they had the blinds open. Jordan insisted that they were going to be good but they were going to sleep on the top bunk together.

I said no.

She said "But he's my best buddy!!"

I said no again.

Sometimes Mommy has to manipulate. The kids will lay down, get tucked in, act like they're going to be good, and then lay quietly for a minute or two until they know I'm long gone and they'll be bouncing off the walls again.

Bet you want to know what I do.

I tell Jordan that I'm going to come back in five minutes to make sure they're both still tucked in their own beds, and that if they aren't, they're both getting a spank.

Seriously, I hardly ever spank them. The threat of the spank is often worse than the spank itself.

I tuck them in tight, kiss and hug them one last time, and then firmly remind them again that I'm coming back in soon to make sure.

I never go back in. What's important is that they think I'm coming back. They also think that once I check once they can fool around again, because the bed check is over. They'll lay quietly and wait for it.

But I know that if I can get them to just lay quietly for five minutes they'll both be fast asleep.

I walk up and down the hall a couple of times right after - usually I need an afghan or to brush my own teeth, or whatever. But I'm not really quiet about it. Because they know I'll hear them if they're being noisy.

And I know that if I don't go back in, they'll stay in their beds and be quiet. And fall asleep.

I'm so sneaky. I impress even myself sometimes.