Mitchell is the slowest kid in the morning. By slowest, I mean slowest kid EVER.
The other kids and I are already eating or finishing breakfast. Mitchell was in his room getting dressed and making his bed for 30 minutes. Now he's come out. He gets up into his chair and takes a look at a bowl with an apple core in it, dangerously close to his spot, that I just finished eating and says (in the whiniest voice ever) "But I wanted cheerios!"
Of course I answered, with the utmost of motherly maturity, "What? You don't want a bowl of apple core?"
The other kids all burst out laughing and now we have three laughing kids, and one kid who is screaming "Stop" at them and swinging his fist threateningly at his brother, while crocodile tears trickle down his cheeks. This is as I get up to get him his cereal.
1. I have actually managed to run five times in the last two weeks, four of which have been at least five miles in length (the running part. I add some walking before, and after, and maybe a little during, but not until the five mile mark). It's really time to start doing this at least eight times in two weeks, and I must seriously push this up to six right shortly.
2. I went to a tupperware party today. Tupperware is a little like crack. And yes, as I pointed out to a friend today, I most certainly do have a tupperware person, and an epicure person. Who doesn't?
3. Steven felt an immense sense of dread upon finding out that we almost had two dogs the other day. Probably because he knows that if it almost happened once, it's not unlikely that something like scooping up "strays" off peoples doorsteps may not happen for real next time.
4. Four "forbidden flutes of insanity" have become part of our family. They are from Hawaii. They we…
Steven's back to school for nine weeks. This time next year he'll be back at school for seven weeks, and then he's done the schooling portion of his job. I'm pretty happy about that, even though technically we're only halfway through it at the moment. Being on EI sucks. I'm thisclose to sitting on the back porch in holey jeans and spitting chewing tobacco into a spittoon.
I do have holey jeans. Lots of them. Good thing it's still cool.
It's not because Steven is on EI. He's not actually on EI all that often. It's because I keep thinking "I'll just quickly drop 46 pounds, and then I'll buy new jeans." Then I eat pie and ponder how long that might take and promise myself that maybe, just maybe tomorrow I'll hop (or flop) onto that treadmill and pound out a few miles and be that much closer to a shopping trip.
My spell check just underlined that entire last paragraph in a red squiggly line. Seriously, sometimes my c…
Mitchie: Mommy, I need to find Froggy.
Me: Get dressed and then we'll find him.
Mitchie: Noooo, I want to find him now.
Me: Get dressed and make your bed and then I'm sure he'll hop out.
Mitchie: (who luckily has not mastered the art of eye rolling) But he's a Teddy.
Me: Didn't you watch Toy Story? They run all over.
Mitchie: But ours don't talk. He's a teddy.
It's nice everything he said was in the whiniest voice ever. But he's just so cute.
I am a little glad they don't really believe their toys come to life. That would be kind of creepy.
Good morning. Sun would make it gooder, but it'll be a while before we see the sun at 6:51 in the morning, or at 5:30 for that matter.
I completely jinxed myself. On Sunday night I went to bed and slept hard and heavy for nine hours. Nine hours! Young children and old people, that's who. But no, somehow I managed to pull it off. Nobody woke up, nobody threw up on themselves (there's been that since Thursday night), Steven's 5:30 alarm didn't even make its way into my dreams.
Of course I told everybody what an awesome night I had.
Never brag or take joy in that. Have silent, in-the-moment happiness, and forget about it. Just go about your day reaping the benefits of being well rested.
Or else the next night you'll still be laying there awake at two a.m., and then at 5:30 when your husband's alarm goes off it'll wake you up for the first time in the seven days he's been going to school.
Then you'll roll over and poutily use your phone to catch up …
Alright so I just played Monopoly Deal with Steven, and you know what? He cheated and he's totally annoying.
Imagine this, you've decided not to be super competitive and maybe let him not lose to badly. So what does he do? Plays with this manic desperation to win, to the point where he's all cheaty and gloaty and MEAN.
He's all: "Oh hey, look, you've got Board Walk, Park Place, and a house, but I have a card that can steal that entire group of properties from you. So give it over. Oh hey, I have a rent card for that. You owe me 11 million dollars. Oh wait, what? You don't have 11 mil? Well you can just make it up by giving me all your green properties.
Oh yes he did. Cheated his way into winning all seven rounds. I tried to be patient with him, I really did. I didn't even pull his arm hair all that hard.
Then he's all "You know, if you're going to be like that, the next time you say 'Hey, let's play cards,' I'm going to just…
I spent the entire day on the couch. Quite literally.
Ellie and Mitchell have the stomach flu, much to their delight and that of everyone around them. Of course I used it as an excuse/reason to cuddle up on the couch with her all day and play Words With Friends on facebook. A friend picked Tennyson up from school and dropped him off here at 11:45. Tennyson and Mitchell just helped themselves to food in the kitchen. I sat on the couch with the laptop, Elliot and a bucket and waited.
The last time she had thrown up was 8am. By 3pm I figured I should probably, maybe clean up the kitchen since she hadn't actually needed the bucket. I started to clean up the breakfast table when Ellie appeared in the doorway and threw up all over the carpet.
This is what happens when one decides to leave the couch. We're now back.
I honked at someone in the ECVS parking lot today.
I know. Pretty brave. Like I'm walking on the wild side, except that the wild would seem to be the elementary school parking lot.
Yesterday I looped through the parking lot and held up traffic for a while attempting to get back into the loop and when nobody moved I started to get worried that people would think it was my fault (even though there was room to get out, but whatever) and start honking at me, so I left the parking lot and parked on the road, and then had to tromp through the freshly fallen snow, and the parking lot, and the throngs of people to find my kid. In my shorts.
I'm so north end bad ass, I know.
Did you know that when the KKP people go to pick up their kids they have to dress down to do it? It's true. They realize that it's almost 3:30, so they put down their glass of chardonnay (this is true, for real), daintily finish up the last of their 3 o'clock caviar on brand name crackers, and slip out …