i want the one in the minnow!

Me: Anybody want any ice-tea?

Mns: I do I do I do I do!

I set three cups on the table.

Tenn: I want the one in the middle!

Tenn: Can I please have the one in the middle?

Mitchie: I want the Thomas one!

Tenn: Mommy, Mommy, Mommy can I PLEASE have the one in the middle?

Me: Yes Tennyson you can have the one in the middle.

Jordan: I want my Dora one.

Mitchie: I want my Thommaaaassss one!

Me: Yes Mitchell, you can have the Thomas one. Stop asking!

Jordan: Haha Tennyson I get a Dora cup. You get a plain old blue cup.

Tenn: I get the one in the middle.

Jordan: But it's boring. There's nothing on it. I have a DORA cup.

Me: (big giant Mom sigh). JORDAN. Is yours better? Really? Is the ice tea actually WORSE because it's in a plain cup? Really?.

Jordan: Yah.

Ugh.

Of course, all of these things are actually said allatthesametime, and the whole while the baby is screeching. I really need to record her sometime so that I can just have it as background music to this blog and you'll truly know what I'm talking about. It's grating.

The cup thing drives me nuts. If I get out three exactly alike cups, then they fight over who gets the middle one. They figure that if they use manners that since I love each of them more (??), I'll ignore that someone else already asked me - also with manners.

Tennyson: Can I please have the one in the middle?
Jordan: Can I please have the one in the middle?
Mitchie: Can I please have the one in the minnow?
Ellie: (throughout) eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

Or:

Tennyson: I want the one in the middle.
Jordan: Can I PLEASE have the one in the middle?
Mitchie: Can I please have the one in the minnow?
Jordan: (they just carry on over Mitchell, because nobody really listens to his little voice anyway) I said PLEASE. Tennyson you have no MANNERS. Mommy. Mommy Mommy Mommy! Can I have the one in the middle? I said please.
Ellie: eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeebbbbabaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Michie: I WANT THE ONE IN THE MINNOW!!
Tennyson: I asked first! Mommy! PLEAAAAAAASSSSSSE!
Ellie: eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeammmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmbrrr

Me: STOP IT! THEY ARE ALL THE SAME!

This is a daily conversation. At each meal/snack/toothbrush time. Each day I feel my blood pressure rise because I'm so sick of this conversation. I slam the cups down even as it's happening. "Look, HEATHENS, they are all - the - same!! It does - not - matter - which - cup - you - get. Jordan. Is the one in the middle ANY. BETTER. than the other ones? Really?

Jordan: But Mommy, can I have the one in the middle?

Sometimes to screw with their little minion heads I'll say "Sure Tennyson" (because he usually asks first), "you can have the one in the middle." Then I'll switch the middle one for a side one, and line them back up. "Which is the one in the middle? Which one do you want?" And then all falls silent, because now all of a sudden there is technically a new middle one, and an original one, and the one that's in the middle now is not the same one that was in the middle when all the pleases and begging started. How, oh how do they choose? Freaking frustrating. For me. Of course they think I'm serious about the big choice, and not on the verge of popping blood vessels in my face.

That part is actually kind of funny. It's like a little bit of mommy revenge, reheated in the microwave of EVIL (ten points for getting the movie reference).

Comments

Candice said…
Megamind!!





Thank you Google.
August 15, 2011 at 10:42 PM
Tiffany said…
Yay Candice!! The best kid movie EVER!!

"Oh my giant blue head!"
August 15, 2011 at 10:48 PM
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