Do you ever open a door into a dark room at night and flip on the lights, imagining that the sudden illumination will reveal a scary, evil man standing inches in front of you? That he's been just waiting in the dark for you to come down and meet your demise? Sometimes I do. Not always, just sometimes. Sometimes when Steven is working the graveyard shift and I am here alone, the sole defender of my children and my home. It is when I am alone here, at night, after all the kids are asleep that my mind wanders to the dreaded “what if's .” What if I was laying in bed one night, sleeping, or almost sleeping, or just laying here awake. What if someone crept down the hallway, searching for easy prey. What if he appeared in my doorway. What would I do? Nobody would hear me cry out for help. But wait, Jordan might hear me, Jordan might come. Then what? What if I just accepted my fate without a sound. Would the kids remain asleep, would he leave them alone? Okay, I know this is