you're going to marry who?
Or is it whom? Damned if I know. I know, I know, I'm supposed to be this big "English Teacher" as Steven refers to me when I correct his abhorrent use of the English language, but I have issue with this "who" vs "whom" thing, so I do what I do best when faced with such a situation - ignore it. I just use "who" everywhere.
Isn't abhorrent an absolutely fantastic word? I love it! Not like I love Tacos. Thanks Lora, that "taco love" vs "true love" stuck with me! People can tell me deep and honest things about themselves, or their kids, and I can't remember anything. I read something about true love being different than the love of tacos and it stays with me forever.
I just took a break to read some other blog posts and now I've completely forgotten what I was talking about, just give me a sec . . .
Okay, got it.
I was watching Ellen the other day, and for the first time ever she was having her wife Portia as a guest on the show. I love Ellen. More than tacos, less than Steven.
Jordan comes wandering through the living room. Teachable moment? Perhaps.
"Hey, Jordan."
"Yes Mommy?"
"Do you see that lady on TV? She's married to another lady."
"But Mommy, girls are supposed to marry boys."
"Well, usually. But sometimes girls can marry girls too."
"Oh."
She seemed a little incredulous, but seemed to accept it. She leaves the room for a few minutes, and then comes back, obviously having decided something.
"Mommy."
"Yes Jordan."
"I'm going to marry Daddy with you."
"Well, Daddy and I are already married, you're going to have to pick someone else. Are you going to marry a boy or a girl?"
"A boy. Maybe Jamin."
"You and Jamin are cousins. You can't marry him, you're going to have to pick someone else."
"Maybe Oliver."
"Sure, you can marry Oliver."
Jordan's going to be 4 in a few months. I never know how much to tell her about things. The other day we were watching Charlotte's Web. Steven's aunt gave it to us and I remembered thinking what a great movie it had been when I was a kid. Then I shove it into the VCR and sort of internally freak out when Wilbur starts crying because he's only a short season away from being bacon. I let it go.
As far as girls marrying girls? I support it. I wouldn't choose it for my kids because I think it's really hard for gay and lesbian people to make their way through this world and its prejudices. Yet if one of my kids was gay I'd be accepting and supportive, and likely the annoying mom who was trying to hard to "help" plan the wedding.
Telling my kids about this kind of thing? Obviously Jordan's too young to understand the full implications of such a thing. She just knows that mommies are girls and daddies are boys. She's never really thought about it.
Our kids are such a clean slate, it amazes me every day. I want so badly to raise them to be open and considerate and to be able to stop and think about different points of view on topics where there are so many different sides and opinions. I want them to see their opinions as just that - an opinion. I don't want them to think that different equals bad.
Another example - there is a LOT of racism in this town. I don't want my kids being racist. Sometimes I think that if I pack up and move us all out of here then they won't learn racism the same way. I know that I can tell them what I think, and hopefully have them thinking the way I do, but I know that they'll go to school in a few years and suddenly the opinions of the other kids are going to matter way more than what Mom thinks.
Is it too much to ask that my kids realize that there are billions of different people on this earth who are not exactly the same as them, and that it's okay? I hope not.
This is starting to get heavy and I'm running out of steam so I'm out of here. I promise the next post will be light-hearted and hugely entertaining.
Isn't abhorrent an absolutely fantastic word? I love it! Not like I love Tacos. Thanks Lora, that "taco love" vs "true love" stuck with me! People can tell me deep and honest things about themselves, or their kids, and I can't remember anything. I read something about true love being different than the love of tacos and it stays with me forever.
I just took a break to read some other blog posts and now I've completely forgotten what I was talking about, just give me a sec . . .
Okay, got it.
I was watching Ellen the other day, and for the first time ever she was having her wife Portia as a guest on the show. I love Ellen. More than tacos, less than Steven.
Jordan comes wandering through the living room. Teachable moment? Perhaps.
"Hey, Jordan."
"Yes Mommy?"
"Do you see that lady on TV? She's married to another lady."
"But Mommy, girls are supposed to marry boys."
"Well, usually. But sometimes girls can marry girls too."
"Oh."
She seemed a little incredulous, but seemed to accept it. She leaves the room for a few minutes, and then comes back, obviously having decided something.
"Mommy."
"Yes Jordan."
"I'm going to marry Daddy with you."
"Well, Daddy and I are already married, you're going to have to pick someone else. Are you going to marry a boy or a girl?"
"A boy. Maybe Jamin."
"You and Jamin are cousins. You can't marry him, you're going to have to pick someone else."
"Maybe Oliver."
"Sure, you can marry Oliver."
Jordan's going to be 4 in a few months. I never know how much to tell her about things. The other day we were watching Charlotte's Web. Steven's aunt gave it to us and I remembered thinking what a great movie it had been when I was a kid. Then I shove it into the VCR and sort of internally freak out when Wilbur starts crying because he's only a short season away from being bacon. I let it go.
As far as girls marrying girls? I support it. I wouldn't choose it for my kids because I think it's really hard for gay and lesbian people to make their way through this world and its prejudices. Yet if one of my kids was gay I'd be accepting and supportive, and likely the annoying mom who was trying to hard to "help" plan the wedding.
Telling my kids about this kind of thing? Obviously Jordan's too young to understand the full implications of such a thing. She just knows that mommies are girls and daddies are boys. She's never really thought about it.
Our kids are such a clean slate, it amazes me every day. I want so badly to raise them to be open and considerate and to be able to stop and think about different points of view on topics where there are so many different sides and opinions. I want them to see their opinions as just that - an opinion. I don't want them to think that different equals bad.
Another example - there is a LOT of racism in this town. I don't want my kids being racist. Sometimes I think that if I pack up and move us all out of here then they won't learn racism the same way. I know that I can tell them what I think, and hopefully have them thinking the way I do, but I know that they'll go to school in a few years and suddenly the opinions of the other kids are going to matter way more than what Mom thinks.
Is it too much to ask that my kids realize that there are billions of different people on this earth who are not exactly the same as them, and that it's okay? I hope not.
This is starting to get heavy and I'm running out of steam so I'm out of here. I promise the next post will be light-hearted and hugely entertaining.
Comments
About the racism, unfortunately we have a few racists in the family. We tell Jake "although we love___, we don't always agree with the way he feels about other people/things he says/things he does" and talk about how everyone looks different but everyone is the same inside.
and it is 1.30 am right now and I'm thinking about tacos and here you go and post about tacolove. grrrr.