um - i'm sure the manual is here somewhere...
For the past while I've been telling people that I'm in a bit of a honeymoon phase with the kids. Jordan had mellowed out, Tennyson was his lovey self, Mitchie entertains himself beautifully and happily follows the other kids around.
You should never say such things. Ever.
They've been desperate to prove me wrong lately.
Mitchell - not bad really. I can totally handle 17 month old antics. Don't tell him, but his angry little slippered foot stomping is actually kind of cute. I'm not even too worried that he's switched from mama's boy to daddy's boy. It's kind of nice that when he's flipping out about something he drags on Daddy's pants instead of mine.
Tennyson - remember how I used to talk about Tennyson? How he was so mellow and cuddly and lovey? Remember how he was a huge sweet, kissing, hugging Mama's boy? Remember that? Do you? I'd say that it feels like it was just yesterday, but it doesn't! It feels like an eternity ago. He is slowly but surely driving me insane. Like, if I wasn't pregnant I'd be somewhat light-headed by 7am. That would be heaven. HEAVEN.
I think it's made worse by the fact that he was such an amicable, sweet, non-handful toddler. Even when he did mischievous things he did them with a cute little impish smile on his face and tried to "cute" his way out of or into it. It made it hard to be mad. There is no trying to cute his way into anything right now. He has the terrible two-year-old rage of an angry running bull. Try saying no to him sometime. Try even telling him to wait a minute for his drink of water so you can finish changing a diaper. He is instantly "not your friend anymore". As if that's not enough he wanders around kicking toys and punching the walls and furniture while giving me the "Tennyson Death Stare." Anything sets him off. And he doesn't listen to anything I say. Spanking never worked well for him. Time outs were fantastic. Now he sits on his stool and screams at the top of his lungs while punching the stool between his legs and rocking back and forth until he falls off. If I put him in his room he kicks and punches the door and rages and cries and screams. This can all be over totally non-issues. I have no idea what to do. I want the monster in him to disappear a little, and his inner teddy-bear to reclaim the lead. I don't want him to sit in time out all day, I don't want to spank him. I don't want to raise my voice (nice euphemism eh?) at him all the time, but he drives me around the bend and I find myself constantly frustrated with him.
If only he knew how much I truly loved him. I don't think he'll truly know until he has his own. Isn't that the bitch of it all? You have no idea how much differently I felt about my mom (and we were close already) after I had kids of my own. To look at your new babies with all the emotion and awe and love of a new parent and for the first time recognize that once upon a time I was that baby, and she was that mom. It's insane.
Not as insane as a two year old who wants you to do something for you NOW, "please" and "thank you" be damned.
You know what else is funny? Thinking you've got this parenting thing all figured out and then having them flip on their right blinker but quickly turn left. What the heck am I supposed to do with that? He knows he was supposed to turn right, but he doesn't care.
Jordan - she was always my sweet little handful. She was the toddler who'd reduce me to tears on a regular basis with her stubborn, muleish ways. She had her evil glare perfected by 17 months old, I kid you not. But she was sweet and lovey too (still is really), so all was forgivable (not that any of this isn't). And as she got older, she got less inclined to try so hard to make mommy crazy. It was so appreciated. In the last while she's been a doll really. She's been every inch the mama's girl. Almost to the point where her indifference to daddy drove me crazy. But she seemed to be more inclined to co-operate and help and aim to please.
Lately? No listening. The other day I cut up an apple for her and told her to stay at the island with it. Two seconds later (literally) I turned my back and she grabbed it and ran downstairs. I hollered at her to come back. She did, but she was mad about it. Tonight Steven tells her to come to the sink in the kitchen to wash her messy hands after supper. She makes a run for it. These things seem like little things, I know, but it's all day. It's constant. Nothing I say is heeded. It's driving me mental. I don't know what to do with that either. Again, I don't want to spank her or have her in time out all day. It's not like she gets away with all this stuff. She knows I'm going to call her back and correct her behavior. She knows that there'll be something done about it. So why the heck can't she just listen? I've never been a mom to be walked all over by them. I could see if she was spoiled, but she's just not.
The two of them together are nuts these days! They climb on top of the piano and leap off of it onto the couch. It's not a little apartment piano - it's full sized. They could get hurt. Nevermind that, they know they're not supposed to climb all over the furniture like monkeys. All day I'm harping on them to get off the piano, off the railing, off the back of the couch. The other day I walked into the living room to see Tennyson standing on the piano. It's high enough that he can reach up and touch the 8-foot ceiling. I hauled him off and gave him a pretty decent spank. Two hours later I came back into the living room to see him flying through the air, again off the piano. What the heck is a person to do? Spank him 18 times a day? Stick him in time-out all day? Nothing works! I am at my wits end.
They're getting meaner with each other. They pinch, they punch, he hits her with toys. Again, time-outs, scoldings, spanks. She pulled his hair the other day because he was sitting on a chair she wanted. He was just sitting there and watching TV and she does this. I spanked her. I hate spanking them. I don't want to do loads of it. Guess what? Twenty minutes later they were back at it, so a lot of good it did. And I don't give those meaningless empty-threat spanks. They know that if I'm going to do it, it's going to be a real one. Again, doesn't do anything. Having them sit in time-out only guarantees peace for as long as the time-out lasts.
If you can call them sitting there and telling me they're not my friends "peace".
It's not like we have a loveless house. We're affectionate, we play, we spend time with our kids. We take them places. We read, we sing, we let them help with the chores they like. We praise them like crazy when they do nice things and show nice behavior. When they're happy they hug and kiss each other for pete's sake.
Lately I feel like I must be the world's worst, most clueless mother.
What the heck to do?
You should never say such things. Ever.
They've been desperate to prove me wrong lately.
Mitchell - not bad really. I can totally handle 17 month old antics. Don't tell him, but his angry little slippered foot stomping is actually kind of cute. I'm not even too worried that he's switched from mama's boy to daddy's boy. It's kind of nice that when he's flipping out about something he drags on Daddy's pants instead of mine.
Tennyson - remember how I used to talk about Tennyson? How he was so mellow and cuddly and lovey? Remember how he was a huge sweet, kissing, hugging Mama's boy? Remember that? Do you? I'd say that it feels like it was just yesterday, but it doesn't! It feels like an eternity ago. He is slowly but surely driving me insane. Like, if I wasn't pregnant I'd be somewhat light-headed by 7am. That would be heaven. HEAVEN.
I think it's made worse by the fact that he was such an amicable, sweet, non-handful toddler. Even when he did mischievous things he did them with a cute little impish smile on his face and tried to "cute" his way out of or into it. It made it hard to be mad. There is no trying to cute his way into anything right now. He has the terrible two-year-old rage of an angry running bull. Try saying no to him sometime. Try even telling him to wait a minute for his drink of water so you can finish changing a diaper. He is instantly "not your friend anymore". As if that's not enough he wanders around kicking toys and punching the walls and furniture while giving me the "Tennyson Death Stare." Anything sets him off. And he doesn't listen to anything I say. Spanking never worked well for him. Time outs were fantastic. Now he sits on his stool and screams at the top of his lungs while punching the stool between his legs and rocking back and forth until he falls off. If I put him in his room he kicks and punches the door and rages and cries and screams. This can all be over totally non-issues. I have no idea what to do. I want the monster in him to disappear a little, and his inner teddy-bear to reclaim the lead. I don't want him to sit in time out all day, I don't want to spank him. I don't want to raise my voice (nice euphemism eh?) at him all the time, but he drives me around the bend and I find myself constantly frustrated with him.
If only he knew how much I truly loved him. I don't think he'll truly know until he has his own. Isn't that the bitch of it all? You have no idea how much differently I felt about my mom (and we were close already) after I had kids of my own. To look at your new babies with all the emotion and awe and love of a new parent and for the first time recognize that once upon a time I was that baby, and she was that mom. It's insane.
Not as insane as a two year old who wants you to do something for you NOW, "please" and "thank you" be damned.
You know what else is funny? Thinking you've got this parenting thing all figured out and then having them flip on their right blinker but quickly turn left. What the heck am I supposed to do with that? He knows he was supposed to turn right, but he doesn't care.
Jordan - she was always my sweet little handful. She was the toddler who'd reduce me to tears on a regular basis with her stubborn, muleish ways. She had her evil glare perfected by 17 months old, I kid you not. But she was sweet and lovey too (still is really), so all was forgivable (not that any of this isn't). And as she got older, she got less inclined to try so hard to make mommy crazy. It was so appreciated. In the last while she's been a doll really. She's been every inch the mama's girl. Almost to the point where her indifference to daddy drove me crazy. But she seemed to be more inclined to co-operate and help and aim to please.
Lately? No listening. The other day I cut up an apple for her and told her to stay at the island with it. Two seconds later (literally) I turned my back and she grabbed it and ran downstairs. I hollered at her to come back. She did, but she was mad about it. Tonight Steven tells her to come to the sink in the kitchen to wash her messy hands after supper. She makes a run for it. These things seem like little things, I know, but it's all day. It's constant. Nothing I say is heeded. It's driving me mental. I don't know what to do with that either. Again, I don't want to spank her or have her in time out all day. It's not like she gets away with all this stuff. She knows I'm going to call her back and correct her behavior. She knows that there'll be something done about it. So why the heck can't she just listen? I've never been a mom to be walked all over by them. I could see if she was spoiled, but she's just not.
The two of them together are nuts these days! They climb on top of the piano and leap off of it onto the couch. It's not a little apartment piano - it's full sized. They could get hurt. Nevermind that, they know they're not supposed to climb all over the furniture like monkeys. All day I'm harping on them to get off the piano, off the railing, off the back of the couch. The other day I walked into the living room to see Tennyson standing on the piano. It's high enough that he can reach up and touch the 8-foot ceiling. I hauled him off and gave him a pretty decent spank. Two hours later I came back into the living room to see him flying through the air, again off the piano. What the heck is a person to do? Spank him 18 times a day? Stick him in time-out all day? Nothing works! I am at my wits end.
They're getting meaner with each other. They pinch, they punch, he hits her with toys. Again, time-outs, scoldings, spanks. She pulled his hair the other day because he was sitting on a chair she wanted. He was just sitting there and watching TV and she does this. I spanked her. I hate spanking them. I don't want to do loads of it. Guess what? Twenty minutes later they were back at it, so a lot of good it did. And I don't give those meaningless empty-threat spanks. They know that if I'm going to do it, it's going to be a real one. Again, doesn't do anything. Having them sit in time-out only guarantees peace for as long as the time-out lasts.
If you can call them sitting there and telling me they're not my friends "peace".
It's not like we have a loveless house. We're affectionate, we play, we spend time with our kids. We take them places. We read, we sing, we let them help with the chores they like. We praise them like crazy when they do nice things and show nice behavior. When they're happy they hug and kiss each other for pete's sake.
Lately I feel like I must be the world's worst, most clueless mother.
What the heck to do?
Comments
No? I don't know what to tell you then. My kids are in a drive-me-crazy stage too.
that's difficult, maybe call the Super Nanny lol...
Caden's changing things up, starting to challenge me a bit, I'll be trained soon again and he'll have to find a new tactic :)